We caught a look at the new commemorative miniature Provisionally Prepared just the other day, but while our Ratling duo have since moved on from their impromptu picnic, they left behind a few scraps of reading material.
“... years of painstaking research by the finest culinary research teams, we are proud to present the 3,850th Regimental Gourmand Better Battlefield Guide – written by Ratlings, for Ratlings (RATLINGS ONLY – NO COMMISSARS ALLOWED). The thousands of new warzones opening up throughout the Segmentum Pacificus have presented a challenge for the RGBBG, but new efforts by our catch-and-cook kill teams in the Chalnath Expanse have given our experts a wealth of experience with new culinary adventures afforded by combat with the T’au Empire and others.
Always remember: an army marches on its stomach, and Ratlings have to take more paces than everyone else – so you deserve better food.
Domestic: Well supported Imperial strongholds with entrenched leadership present ample opportunities for ingredient acquisition, especially with common security features degraded by repeat firing of the Great Gun. We recommend using regular alarum calls and loading procedures to access high-priority areas under cover of the commotion – look for gaps in walls and collapsed vents to access officers' quarters.
Battlefield Opportunities: Despite the T’au Empire’s supposed care for their troops, their collectivist dogma is both heretical AND quashes all hope for culinary excitement. Shockingly, commanders are even seen to eat the same basic rations as their subordinates, which while nutritionally complete lack diversity and should be seen as a last resort. We recommend ambushing Water caste envoys, who often carry rare and exotic foods as gifts for traitorous collaborators – a win-win scenario.
Editor’s Note: Initial testing shows Vespid ‘Stingwings’ taste similar to common shellfish options when poached with butter and lemon – more in-field research needed.
Domestic: Formerly a hotspot of high-quality local ingredients and carelessly comfortable storehouse custodians, the booming food scene in Bastior unfortunately attracted the attention of our great culinary rivals – the Tyranids. With little respect for the efforts of Bastior’s finest cuisinarians, these uncouth xenos have harvested almost all available biomass in the system, doing irreparable damage to the region’s menu. It is with heavy hearts that we downgrade our rating.
Battlefield Opportunities: While Tyranids are by no means experienced in the culinary arts, their biomass slurries can possess quite interesting flavour profiles depending on the region. We recommend small drops taken from the agri-plains as a seasoning, where the natural acidity is balanced by curious expressions of fresh vegetables and pleasing citrus notes.
Domestic: Operations in the Pariah Nexus are currently conducted by a contingent from the Adeptus Mechanicus, which should tell avid RGBBG readers all they need to know. You may be able to acquire some of the Archmagos’ top-shelf nutrient paste with a little effort – known for its unique piquancy and ozone tang – but they have eyes literally everywhere. Exercise caution.
Battlefield Opportunities: On NO ACCOUNT are you to try drinking the glowing green liquid, which may carry visual similarities to popular liqueurs from the Damocles region, but will dissolve your insides in a fatal and – more importantly – flavourless manner. There is nothing to eat in this blighted wasteland. Avoid at all costs. Emperor damn these flavorless metal monstrosities.
